Where I accidentally drop expensive things at my job

Recently I’ve been trying to post on this blog more often, specifically at least two times a week. Sometimes I’m good at doing this, and other times I’m not. The biggest obstacle is time. It should probably go without saying that my day job at Costco takes up the biggest chunk of my time that I could be using to write.

For instance, I wrote most of this post at 1am when I had to be at work at 8am, followed by volunteering with my church at the homeless shelter immediately afterwards when I got off at 4:30. I’m always busy. And work is about to get even crazier because Costco is about to enter…

PIZZAPALUZZA

(When I typed “Pizzapaluzza into my Microsoft word document for the first time it did NOT underline it in red. Really Microsoft? We both know that’s not a real word, it’s just me being clever.)

For those of you who don’t know, I work in the deli department at Costco, and we make take and bake pizzas. These Pizzas are 14 inches across and during PIZZAPALUZZA they are only $5.99.

pizzapaluzza

I know right?! You’re probably already closing your laptop to rush out and get a Costco membership. But before you do that, let me tell you about PIZZAPALUZZA, so you understand where I’m coming from.

1.PIZZAPALUZZA is SUCH a brilliant way to describe what happens at my warehouse when our pizzas go on sale. It’s so crazy that it needs its own special name. Our pepperoni pizzas go on sale three times a year, and one of those times is always around the Superbowl. Last year we sold over 400 pepperoni pizzas the day before the Superbowl, more than any other Costco in Texas. This Wednesday, the day before the sale started, we prepared by making 150 pizzas ahead of time. We have to pull in people from other departments. People will buy 5, 10, 15 pizzas at a time. It gets crazy. I tried to explain PIZZAPALUZZA to my supervisor Nuffie the other day, because this is his first one. He’s still innocent, he doesn’t know what it feels like yet. So we had this conversation:

Me: “Nuffie, when our pizzas go on sale I call it, “PIZZAPALUZZA”.

Nuffie: “Haha, you’re dumb.”

Me: “Because people will be dishing out a lot of DOUGH for our pizza. People will be spending some serious CHEESE to get a SLICE of our PIE.”

Nuffie: “Please stop.”

He doesn’t understand. But he will.

2.I might have mentioned this briefly before, but I’m somewhat clumsy.

Last week me and my best friend Megan had a conversation about a potential date that I might go on and she said to me, “ You’re very charming, just don’t knock anything over on him. I only say this because when we’re together you always knock something over.” This clumsiness follows me to work. And then my coworkers blow it TOTALLY out of proportion. It’s sort of a running gag at work actually. I drop things all the time, but there were three specific times where I dropped big, expensive things.

One was a month ago when I did NOT KNOCK OVER, BUT WAS STEERING WHEN IT FELL OVER, a cart full of raw chickens ready to go into the oven. Specifically there were 32. We sell those for five dollars each. You figure out the math, it will depress me if I do it.

That’s the biggest one recently, another big accident happened for me at PIZZAPALUZZA.

It was that Saturday I mentioned where we sold more pizzas than any other Costco in Texas. That sounds impressive, but it comes at a price. This day, that price was breaking my spirit. I was closing, and we were waaaaaaaaaay behind. It was a very stressful evening, and I was running around the department like an insane person, not even knowing where to start with cleaning. My supervisor Emmanuel was staying late to help me prepare shrimp for the next day. Every night at Costo we thaw out big, expensive boxes of frozen cooked shrimp for the next day. Like pounds upon pounds of shrimp. You know where this is going.

In my haste, I knocked over a cart full of hundreds of dollars worth of shrimp…

frown

For the second time.

frown2

Yes, I’ve knocked over carts full of expensive shrimp twice. Both times in front of one of my bosses.

And that’s when I burst into tears, which was good in a way because it meant that Emmanuel didn’t yell at me for being a clumsy ox, but instead just patted me awkwardly on the shoulder.

So anyways, things at Costco get pretty crazy. Even when they aren’t crazy I drop things, less expensive things though. So much so that sometimes when someone finds something on the floor, I will hear, “Alright Tara, what did you do this time?” But since I am so breathtakingly charming and helpful, I have not been fired yet. That’s all for today, and now you know that if you don’t hear from me in a while it’s because i’m off at work.

Probably dropping things.

-Tara

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